9 Things That Turn Guys On

Keeping a boyfriend sexually fulfilled — and uninterested in looking elsewhere — ranks high on most women's priority lists. These 9 turn ons for guys will help you keep your man engaged, aroused, and genuinely satisfied.

1. How You Present Yourself

I don't love being the one to say it, but making an effort to dress attractively and take care of your appearance genuinely matters, since visual attraction plays a huge role in what turns guys on. You can brush this off if you want, but looks really do factor into male arousal. That said, this isn't a call to become a fitness model, cake on makeup, or dress as provocatively as possible just to hold a guy's interest.

Related: How to look hot

What I'm really getting at is that a few small, deliberate choices can help you put your best foot forward:

Your outfit choices – This isn't about baring skin to turn him on — it's about choosing clothes that flatter your best features. Naturally curvy with an hourglass shape? Dress to highlight it. Great legs? Skip the baggy jeans in favor of a skirt or fitted pants. If lingerie is your thing, find pieces that actually suit your body. You get the picture.

Hair and makeup – More makeup isn't automatically better. The goal is using it to highlight your strong points and soften any blemishes. Great skin already? Skip heavy foundation. Dealing with a breakout? A little concealer can go a long way.

Experimentation is key here.

One night out, try emphasizing your eyes with makeup; the next, tone it down and see what happens. The same logic applies to your hairstyle — up, down, or in a ponytail. Play around and notice what actually gets your man's attention.

2. What Comes Out of Your Mouth

If you're after a reliable way to turn your man on, start weaving dirty talk into your everyday conversations. If you've never tried it, you'll likely be shocked at how effectively it builds arousal, keeps him thinking about you, and ramps up sexual tension between you two.

A common misconception is that dirty talk has to be extremely raunchy or crude. It absolutely can be, but doesn't have to be. Subtle and low-key phrases work just as well. None of the lines below sound remotely "filthy," yet they're highly effective:

• I can't wait to get you home tonight!
• There's something really hot about seeing you in that pair of jeans!
• I wish there was nobody else here, that it was just you and me…

Of course, if you'd rather go bold and explicit, that works too:

• I can't wait to feel you inside me later.
• I love feeling you on top of me, dominating me! Learn how to be submissive.
• I want to feel your cock in my mouth, while I suck you dry. Discover how to give a good blow job.

Try mixing both styles and see what resonates most. You might also pull from these 64 dirty talk examples or these 91 dirty phrases to say to a guy to turn him on.

3. Genuine Enthusiasm Is Infectious

Enthusiasm ranks as one of the strongest turn ons for men, period. Showing genuine excitement while getting intimate signals to him that he's genuinely arousing you.

Why does that matter so much for turning him on?

It's straightforward — every guy has an ego, and your visible enthusiasm feeds it, making him feel wanted and attractive. It might sound like a small thing, but it's an incredibly powerful lever to pull.

So how do you actually show that enthusiasm? A few ideas:

• Get more vocal (dirty talk counts here too)
• Take the lead and initiate sex — more on that shortly
• Actively participate instead of staying passive

P.S. Guys should know how to turn a woman on in return, too.

4. How You Carry Yourself

As mentioned, appearance carries real weight when it comes to arousing your boyfriend — it's one of my go-to sex tips for women. Movement is a big piece of that puzzle. Here's what to consider when it comes to making your movement sexier.

• Are your movements quick, jittery, and restless? Or slow and graceful as you move through a room?
• Does your walk highlight your best features naturally, or does it feel stiff and unflattering?

Next time you're at a gathering or spending time with your partner, keep these questions in mind.

Keep a look out: 17 signs that you are turning him on like crazy.

5. Playful Energy Beats Dull Small Talk

One of the biggest turn ons for men is a partner who's genuinely fun and flirtatious — not someone firing off a string of interview-style questions. Beyond checking out my guide to flirting with a guy, here are a few concrete ways to bring more playfulness into your interactions:

• While chatting, gently rib him about something — how he phrased a sentence, how he's holding his drink, even his outfit. Keep it lighthearted, the way you'd tease a younger sibling, never actually insulting him.
• Another flirting move: touch him a bit more than usual. Brush his arm when he says something funny, or playfully shove him if he says something cheeky.
• You can also flirt by deliberately misreading what he says. If he mentions being tired and wanting to go home, you might jokingly twist that into him wanting to take you home, then call him out on it — again, all in good fun.
• Flirting over text works well too when you're apart.

The core principle behind flirting to turn him on is treating it like a playful game rather than something overly serious. And keep an eye out for 13 signs he's flirting back with you.

6. How You Position Things in the Bedroom

Introducing new positions is another great way to turn your man on, tying directly back to the enthusiasm point above — trying new things with him signals just how into it you are.

Nervous about attempting something like Cowgirl? You can work past that and learn to ride your man confidently.

7. Fresh Sexual Techniques

New positions are only part of the equation for great, arousing sex — learning new moves matters too, whether that's fresh blow job techniques, hand job techniques, or anything that leans into kinkier territory.

8. Taking Initiative and Gentle Dominance

Alongside enthusiasm and trying new techniques, taking charge in the bedroom is a genuine turn on for men. Rather than describing a new position or bringing it up beforehand, just go for it.

Grab him and shift positions without warning, or have him sit on the couch and start deep throating him without any preamble. The surprise element alone tends to be a huge turn on.

Plenty of women assume something like giving a great blow job automatically reads as submissive. It doesn't have to! You can absolutely lead the encounter using these dominance tips.

9. Steamy Text Messages

Last on this list: sending dirty texts. This lets you turn him on even when you're apart. As with verbal dirty talk, sexy texting doesn't need to be explicit to work — even subtle messages can be remarkably effective.

Now that you're familiar with what turns guys on, take a look at these 26 things that turn men off so you know what to steer clear of too.

February 2, 2022