27 Orgasmic Blow Job Tips To Blow His Mind

On this page, you'll discover powerful ways to warm up before your blow job, plus 27 amazing, orgasm-triggering blow job tips that will have your man's eyes rolling back in pure bliss. Click here to skip straight to these blow job tips and bypass the build-up techniques.

By the way, this page is chapter two of the Blow Job Guide. Chapter 1 of the Blow Job Guide is here.

Building Up To Your BJ – Teasing & Tantalizing Your Man

Some guys are always ready for sex or oral, no warm-up needed. But that's not universal. Plenty of men actually need some coaxing to get turned on and in the mood, and this tends to become more common as your man gets older [1].

Here are several approaches to get him worked up before things turn physical:

Sexy Selfies – Texting your man a spicy photo while he's at work or the gym is a great way to spark his interest and get him anticipating what's coming. An app like Snapchat works well if you'd rather not have the pictures saved on your phone. Check out this guide to taking sexy selfies for more tips.

Dirty Texts & Sexting – While he's out of the house or at his job, send him a few racy messages hinting at what's on your mind and what you've got planned for later. It could be blunt, like "I can wait to feel you explode in my mouth tonight," or a bit more subtle, like "Can't wait to see you later…and my lips can't wait either ;)" You could also describe, in detail, a blow job technique you've just picked up that you plan to try on him.

You'll find more great advice on sexy texting in this chapter of the Dirty Talking Guide.

Out & About – When you're out together in public or at a dinner gathering where intimacy isn't an option, that's actually the ideal moment to lean in and murmur something in his ear about what you've got planned later. The Dirty Talking Guide offers step-by-step tips, examples, and phrases to build tension and keep him guessing.

A General Guideline For Tantalizing Him – Men are often turned on by things that don't do much for many women [2], so keep that in mind as you brainstorm your own approach to teasing him before a blow job.

That's why he might get excited seeing a nude photo of you, even though a shot of him doesn't have the same effect on you. It also explains why reading erotica might get you worked up while it barely registers for him. In short, what turns you on won't necessarily turn him on, and the reverse is just as true.

His Turn Ons – Your guy likely has personal triggers and turn-ons that ramp up his anticipation and sexual tension. These could include things like:

• Bringing up a particularly steamy memory you two share.
• Murmuring a certain "trigger" word or phrase near his ear.
• Sensually touching a specific area of his body.
• Giving him a certain kind of look.

The trick is figuring out and understanding his unique triggers, then using them to keep his mind occupied and eager for what's ahead.

A Long Build Up – You could spend a full hour teasing and slowly building anticipation for your blow job… or you could stretch it out over multiple days.

If you won't be seeing him for a while, start sending flirty texts, photos, and detailed descriptions of what you're planning days in advance.

The whole time, he'll be thinking about you, aching with anticipation.

Not only will this leave your man craving oral sex, but you might notice these tactics get you turned on too. Learn the things that our readers do to get horny.

Fellatio Foreplay

It might surprise you, but men actually crave longer foreplay more than most women realize [3], even though most guys get aroused faster than most women do [4]. So while a quick, spontaneous blow job can be incredibly hot (think sneaking away during a party), a slower, teasing build-up tends to produce a much bigger finish [5]… and an even bigger grin.

This might be the single most powerful — and most overlooked — piece of advice in this whole guide. With that in mind, here's a batch of excellent "fellatio foreplay" moves to try before going down on him:

Hand Massage – This is about as simple as it gets. While kissing him, chatting, or just standing close, place your hand on his crotch, resting it over his underwear or pants. Ease into it by starting your hand on his leg and gradually moving upward. Then softly begin massaging his penis and testicles through the fabric.

It's as easy as gently running your hands over the area, though you can also turn up the intensity by softly gripping and squeezing before releasing the pressure.

After a few minutes of this, help him out of his pants and underwear.

Then keep going, running your hands over him directly. You can also lightly trace your fingers up and down his shaft and around his balls. Want more hand job techniques? Check out the Hand Job Guide here.

Talking To Him On Your Knees – Another effective blow job build-up is talking to him while kneeling in front of him.

Start simple, something like, "So what do you want me to do now, baby?" while holding his penis in your hands — he's almost guaranteed to ask for a blow job. He might even offer a tip about exactly how he likes it!

As you get more comfortable and notice his excitement building, expand your dirty talk by:

• Telling him how much you're enjoying going down on him.
• Mentioning that you can't wait to taste him.
• Saying how giving him oral turns you on too.

Of course, you can keep talking dirty throughout the blow job itself. The Dirty Talking Guide covers everything you need to know about that.

So Close – Another approach to build up to your blow job is working around his manhood before diving in. Instead of taking him straight into your mouth, try:

• Kissing around his crotch and groin.
• Gently working his balls with your tongue.
• Lightly "tickling" his testicles with your fingertips.
• Dragging your nails over his ass cheeks.

The Kiss Trail – A steamy way to transition smoothly from kissing to oral is working your way slowly downward, kissing from his lips to his penis. Move from his mouth to his neck, chest, stomach, and finally his groin. This works especially well if he's already fully undressed.

Along the way, take note of his most sensitive areas.

Read More: The Most Important Erogenous Zones.

For more foreplay ideas, check out the Love Curi Foreplay Guide here.

Should You Start Fast or Slow – There's something incredibly hot about tearing your man's pants off and immediately taking him into your mouth, working eagerly toward his climax with barely any build-up at all.

Sometimes there just isn't time for foreplay, or there's a thrill of possibly getting caught. That's part of why people love a good quickie!

Read More: Quickies 101

On the flip side, it can be just as satisfying to draw things out, teasing him slowly until he's practically begging you to hurry, spending minute after minute barely grazing his penis before finally taking him in.

Both approaches can be incredibly satisfying for your man, despite being polar opposites.

The key is knowing which one fits which moment, and…

Not relying on just a single trick for every blow job.

You can also mix in any of the 22 foreplay techniques from this post to keep things fresh.

So the next time you're about to go down on him, ask yourself:

What would he enjoy more:

• A long, slow, teasing build-up where he's practically pleading with you to hurry, or…
• Skipping the build-up entirely because all you can think about is taking him in your mouth right now.

Now let's get into the blow job tips that will drive him absolutely wild…

Tips for a Good Blow Job

You're both ready for the main event — now what? Try these bj tips!

Flick The Frenulum

For a lot of men, the frenulum is the single most sensitive spot on the penis. It's the underside of the tip, right where the glans meets the shaft [6].

One intensely pleasurable move is using the tip of your tongue to apply a light flicking motion right there. While this area naturally gets stimulated while you're sucking him (learn tips on sucking here and here) or licking his shaft (learn some oral sex licking techniques here), this technique is different because you're concentrating all your attention on one precise point.

Flicking his frenulum makes for a great opening move before taking his entire length into your mouth. Try flicking up-and-down, side-to-side, in circles, or mixing all three together.

Keep in mind that if he's circumcised, his frenulum may be partially or completely removed [7].

Blowing Him

Plenty of women get so nervous about giving head that they dive straight in with zero build-up or teasing, as if the only goal is making him finish and getting it over with.

Slowly teasing your man and letting the anticipation build until he's practically begging you to go down on him is essential if you want your blow jobs to go from good to unforgettable.

Another great tension-builder is licking him gently with plenty of saliva, then blowing softly across the wet trail you've left. The cool sensation this creates is fantastic for teasing him and drawing out moans of pleasure.

More tips on licking him here.

Try this for roughly a minute before taking him into your mouth.

Kiss, Kiss

Another excellent opener is simply kissing his penis all over. This works well if you enjoy taking your time and teasing him.

You can kiss him however you like, though it's easier to control if you hold his shaft steady with your hand. Try quick, light pecks or slower, more intense kisses. He'll especially appreciate extra wet, sloppy kisses. Don't be surprised if you notice precum or fluid starting to appear at this point.

You can even use that precum to moisten your lips.

Kissing is also a great way to pull back if you sense he's getting close and want to prolong things before he climaxes. It also gives your jaw a break if it's starting to tire from having him in your mouth.

The Thing With Teeth

You already know how sensitive his penis is, especially the underside of the head [8]. That sensitivity is great for pleasure, but too much pressure or roughness will hurt him. The same principle applies to your clit and vagina during masturbation or when he goes down on you. Check out some orgasmic masturbation techniques from Chapter 2 of our Orgasm Guide.

Just picture how painful it would be if his nails kept snagging on your skin — or worse, if he used his teeth while going down on you during cunnilingus. It would be unbearable.

The one non-negotiable rule for giving him oral is that your teeth should never make contact. Doing so can wreck an otherwise amazing blow job.

But what if he's particularly large, or you have a smaller mouth?

In cases like that, avoiding teeth during a blowjob can feel nearly impossible. One fix is wrapping your lips over your teeth so they form a soft cushion. Another option is focusing on techniques that don't involve taking him fully into your mouth, like these ones, or giving him a hand job instead (learn everything about hand jobs in this guide).

Side note: A small number of men actually enjoy light teeth contact with gentle, feather-light pressure. My advice is to never attempt this unless he brings it up himself first.

Related: Why 92.6% Of Women Like Giving Blow Jobs [1,114 Woman Study]

Which Blow Job Position Is Best?

The position you choose for going down on him can matter a lot — or barely at all.

Here's the breakdown:

Submissive Positions – If you want to lean into feeling submissive during oral, kneeling down (or being guided down by him) while he stands over you can create that dynamic, with him feeling more dominant in turn.

Looking up and maintaining eye contact during your blow job while on your knees can amplify that submissive energy.

Having your wrists bound behind your back, giving him even more control, can push that feeling even further.

Dominant Positions – Alternatively, you could push him onto his back on the bed, straddle his face, and slowly lower yourself onto his mouth while commanding, "Lick It!" Then lean forward to reciprocate and start giving him oral in the 69 position.

To intensify things further, reach back, grab a handful of his hair, and pull him closer against you.

Or tie his hands to the bed frame.

Exotic Positions – Or, to spice up oral sex, simply try an angle you've never used before.

The point is that your position can significantly add to his pleasure (and yours too).

Position matters even more if your guy is especially visually stimulated, and let's be honest, most guys are.

Speaking of visuals…

Mirrors – Another way to enhance the visual experience is incorporating a mirror.

You don't need to mount a custom mirror above your bed, but…

Consider giving him oral in front of a standard wall mirror, or near a large window or glass shower door where he can catch your reflection.

Learn: How to have passionate sex in front of a mirror.

Find more inspiration in this list of oral sex positions.

My Most Vital Blow Job Trick

In Chapter 1, I covered how important it is to feel physically comfortable while going down on him if you want to actually enjoy the experience yourself.

This next trick builds directly on that idea. Here's the thing…

One study puts the average erect penis at roughly 5 inches (12.9cm) [9], while another finds it closer to 5.6 inches (14.15cm) [10], and earlier research put it above 6 inches [11] (this might catch some guys off guard, since up to 85% of men overestimate what's typical [12]).

Now…

The distance from your lips to the back of your throat varies depending on your jaw's shape and size. Some put it around 3-4 inches. You can measure your own by using a dildo and testing how far you can comfortably take it.

Doing the math…

This means if you take him all the way to the base, he's likely to hit the back of your throat and set off your gag reflex. That's not an issue if you don't have one, but most people do, some more sensitive than others. Find tips in the guide on how to deep throat without gagging.

Magic Hand Trick – To prevent triggering your gag reflex, start your blow job by placing a hand at the base of his penis so you can control exactly how deep he goes.

If he's especially well-endowed, wrap a couple of fingers around the base so only part of him enters your mouth. Otherwise, just rest your hand near the base or on his thigh.

This alone takes gagging off the table and lets you focus entirely on maximizing his pleasure.

Giving Feedback With A Dick In Your Mouth

As mentioned earlier, most guys respond strongly to visuals, but what you might not realize is they also love hearing what's happening.

How exactly does he "hear" your blow job?

Through your licking, slurping, kissing, breathing, and moaning.

I don't mean exaggerated, fake noises as you move up and down.

I mean the natural sounds that happen during oral sex — most guys genuinely love them. In fact, research shows the sounds women make can actually help their partner reach orgasm [13].

So if you find yourself slurping loudly or gasping for air after deep throating him, don't assume it's a turnoff. Guys love it.

And…

If you're genuinely enjoying yourself, don't hold back on moaning, even with him in your mouth.

The Initiation

Who usually makes the first move sexually — you or your partner?

Take a second to think about that.

If you're both happy with the same person always initiating, great!

But most guys actually prefer some variety, where sometimes he starts things and sometimes you do.

Try to stay aware of this dynamic in your relationship, since it can be really exciting for him if you wake him up with a surprise morning blow job (or you might prefer morning sex instead).

Equally hot: him pulling you close, guiding you to your knees, and unzipping his pants himself.

In short, let him take the lead sometimes, and other times you should be the one to start things.

The same logic applies across other sexual activities. Discover 9 ways to initiate sex.

The Don'ts Of Good Blow Jobs

Hopefully, after reading this chapter of the Blow Job Guide (click here for the other chapters of the Blow Job Guide), you can see how achievable it is to give your man an incredible blow job. There's a huge range of techniques you can use to bring him intense pleasure.

But before diving in, there are a handful of key things to keep in mind so you don't accidentally undercut your technique or reduce his pleasure…

Teeth – Already covered earlier in this piece — accidental teeth contact is a real risk. Refer back to this section for the best ways to prevent it.

Expecting Payback – I touched on this in Chapter 1 of the Blow Job Guide, but it bears repeating…

Ideally, every partner would give pleasure generously without expecting something equal in return. Sure, that's a bit idealistic and not always realistic. Still, sex (and blow jobs specifically) shouldn't be treated as a transaction where you only give in order to receive.

Sex isn't a tit-for-tat exchange.

To Control – Using oral sex or any of these tips as leverage to control your partner is a recipe for problems. Withholding sex to manipulate your husband into doing something will quickly poison both of your attitudes toward sex. Likewise, dangling a blow job as a reward for good behavior sets up an unhealthy dynamic long-term.

Of course, this doesn't apply to roleplaying scenarios where the goal is to playfully "break" him or coax out a secret through teasing.

Lack Of Variation – An easy-to-overlook but important "don't" is falling into a rut. Just as repeating the same tasks at work day after day gets monotonous, the same holds true in bed. Research actually shows that while both men and women enjoy novelty, men tend to crave new sexual experiences even more [14] — so why not deliver!

In other words, if you rely on the same two moves every single time, he'll eventually stop looking forward to it. The goal is enough variety in your repertoire to keep him guessing. That said, too much variety can backfire too…

Too Much Variation! – So you've bookmarked Love Curi and read it daily to pick up new positions (check out over 100 different sex positions with illustrations in the Sex Positions Guide here), blow job techniques, and dirty talk tips (read the Dirty Talking Guide here). Every day you're adding to your toolkit for giving him incredible orgasms. It's tempting to think you need something completely new every single time and abandon the techniques that already work well.

Constant reinvention isn't actually a winning strategy for a satisfying sex life. It's like gutting your house every six months, tossing out furniture you love along with pieces you don't. Why throw away what's already working? Keep what you genuinely enjoy.

In short, experiment with new ideas, but don't abandon the tried-and-true techniques that already please him.

Now that you've got the fundamentals of building up to your blow job down, move on to Chapter 3 of the Blow Job Guide, where you'll learn advanced, orgasm-inducing techniques. Or head back to Chapter 1 for a full overview of the guide.

August 12, 2020