14 Wild Sex Facts About Men They Skipped In Health Class

You've probably absorbed the idea that female sexuality is complicated and that women stay a mystery to men forever. But a lot of what gets repeated as fact about male sexuality turns out to be wrong, and you might be surprised at what's actually true when it comes to men.

Keep reading for the sex facts about men that your high school health class conveniently left out.

1. Men Have Their Own Version of the G-spot

The so-called "male G-spot" refers to the prostate — a highly sensitive gland that can be stimulated through the perineum (the area between the anus and scrotum) or directly through the anus. It sits roughly two inches inside and is about the size of a walnut. Once he gets past any hesitation, the prostate opens the door to an entirely new kind of pleasure.

Plenty of couples explore prostate stimulation together, whether by hand or with toys. When a woman uses a strap-on with her male partner, it's referred to as pegging.

If the prostate becomes congested, it can cause real discomfort. Prostate cancer, meanwhile, is the most commonly diagnosed cancer among men [1], affecting over 200,000 men annually [2].

2. The Average Penis Is Smaller Than People Assume

The well-known 1979 Kinsey survey pegged the average erect penis length at somewhere between 5 and 5.65 inches [3], meaning even a 6-inch penis lands above average! Since then, researchers have dug deeper into how size varies by ethnicity and other factors.

There's also been research into what women actually prefer in a partner's penis. Women tend to favor slightly longer, wider penises for casual encounters, while size matters far less in long-term relationships [4]. It's not purely about size — height and body type also shape overall attractiveness [5].

Related: Does Size Really Matter?

There's also an important distinction between two types of men: showers and growers. A shower already has a fairly large flaccid penis that simply fills with blood upon arousal. A grower starts smaller when soft but can change dramatically in size once erect.

Biology plays a role here too — some men's erectile tissue is naturally more elastic, allowing for a fuller erection. This elasticity is one factor tied to erectile dysfunction. Learn more in our guide to boners.

That same elastic tissue can also change with age. As men get older, this elasticity typically declines.

3. His Size Is Pretty Much Fixed

Despite every pump, pill, and gimmick flooding your spam folder, there's genuinely no reliable way to increase penis size. Genetics and a bit of luck determine what a man has to work with. Once the final teen growth spurt wraps up — thanks to a testosterone surge — his penis size stays essentially the same for life.

Did you know a cock ring can help produce firmer erections and make him feel bigger in the moment?

There's some evidence that erectile tissue stays more elastic with regular use — one more reason to keep having sex!

4. Testosterone Shapes His Penis in More Ways Than You'd Think

As noted, testosterone drives changes like body hair growth, a deepening voice, and penis growth during puberty. Research shows testosterone treatments can sometimes increase penis size, though this works best in younger boys [6].

Testosterone also fuels desire in both men and women. Men with lower testosterone levels often experience a diminished sex drive compared to those with typical or elevated levels, and testosterone therapy can sometimes help [7]. A similar treatment approach has also shown success for women dealing with low libido [8].

It's commonly assumed that men have a higher sex drive purely because of elevated testosterone compared to women, but frequent sexual activity like masturbation may itself help sustain a stronger interest in sex [9]. Which brings us to our next point.

5. Testosterone Isn't the Only Hormone in Play

No list of sex facts about men would be complete without a nod to hormones in general. Hormones and sex have a complex, ongoing relationship — shaping our behavior both during and after the act.

For example, oxytocin levels rise during sex, and it's largely responsible for that cuddly, bonded feeling afterward [10] (a similar effect occurs between mother and child during breastfeeding). Oxytocin is so effective at inducing relaxation that it behaves almost like a sedative [11], particularly in men. That explains why men often drift off so quickly post-sex.

It's not disinterest in you — his body chemistry simply isn't cooperating with staying awake.

6. Most Men Masturbate, and Many Do It Frequently

Pinning down exact masturbation rates among men isn't simple. But a landmark 1994 study on human sexuality by Edward O. Laumann, John H. Gagnon, Robert T. Michael, and Stuart Michael found that 63% of men and 42% of women had masturbated within the past year [13].

Men don't just masturbate more often on average — they're also more likely to do it consistently compared to women [13]. One study found that "35.9% of men and 8.8% of women reported having masturbated at least once a week in the prior year" [14]. That same research found women who did masturbate were more likely to do so a few times a year up to monthly.

One major upside of masturbating often is understanding your own preferences and what actually gets you off — something plenty of women struggle to figure out. That's exactly why solo exploration is so valuable for your sex life, and the Love Curi has plenty of resources on the subject. These posts might help:

• How to Masturbate
• 8 Explosive Techniques for Fingering Yourself
• How to Use a Vibrator for Intense Orgasms

Keep in mind that most men are already extremely familiar with handling their own penis. Since you obviously don't have that same lifelong hands-on experience, expect to need a little practice to nail a great handjob. No worries, though — check out these 23 tips to give him a fantastic hand job.

7. Ejaculation Happens at Astonishing Speed

Here's a lighter sex fact about men: ejaculation can travel at speeds up to 45 kph!

Interestingly, a woman's vagina significantly slows that momentum down. It can take several hours for sperm to travel from the vagina to the cervix, and the vast majority of sperm never even come close to reaching an egg for fertilization.

That's not a reason to skip condoms or birth control, though.

For the record, sperm can shoot vertically over 38 inches from the body under the right conditions [16].

8. Sometimes Ejaculation Goes the Other Way

When you picture ejaculation, you probably imagine semen shooting outward from the penis. That's the typical scenario, but not always the case.

Occasionally, semen travels backward into the bladder instead of exiting the body — a phenomenon called retrograde ejaculation. It can sometimes signal an underlying condition like diabetes [17] [18].

Generally, it's harmless, and retrograde ejaculation can resolve on its own without treatment [19]. It can become relevant, though, if pregnancy is the goal.

9. Men Deal With Sexual Anxiety Too

Many sex facts about men focus purely on biology, which is fascinating in its own right. But male psychology offers plenty of insight too — and knowing this one could actually work in your favor.

We hear regularly from women dealing with sexual anxiety on the Love Curi, and it's an extremely common experience. But it's not exclusive to women. Men experience it as well, particularly the first time undressing in front of a new partner, before losing their virginity, or after a long stretch without sex.

Men aren't immune to worrying about how their bodies look or how well they're performing. So while you're stressing over whether you're attractive enough or skilled enough at oral sex, chances are he's silently wrestling with similar doubts.

The upside is that he's far less fixated on whatever flaws you're worried about, so it's worth relaxing a bit. You can even bond and laugh together over shared insecurities.

Be sure to check out our piece on overcoming sexual anxiety.

10. Plenty of Men Value Emotional Connection Over Just Sex

To be clear — plenty of men genuinely enjoy casual sex, just like plenty of women do. Nothing wrong with that.

But the common stereotypes about men don't tell the whole story. Many guys actually find casual sex hollow or unsatisfying. They'd rather sleep with someone they truly care about.

Beyond that, having regular sex with the same partner lets you build real trust and explore together in ways a single encounter simply can't offer.

Related: How to Have a One-Night Stand

11. He's Not Thinking About Sex Every Seven Seconds

You've likely heard the myth that men think about sex every seven seconds — or maybe a variation putting it at six or ten seconds. It just isn't accurate, and you won't find this "fact" on any legitimate list of sex facts about men.

In reality, men think about sex far less often than popular belief suggests. One study found that young men think about sex a median of 18.6 times per day, compared to 9.9 times for women [20].

12. He Usually Can't Go Right Back for Round Two

One perk of being a woman is the potential for back-to-back orgasms, or at least the ability to keep going after the first one. Male sexuality doesn't typically work that way. After orgasm, his body simply isn't ready to continue, even if he manages to stay awake.

It takes time before renewed stimulation feels good and he can become erect again — sometimes half an hour or longer [21]. During that stretch, neither of you may feel much interest in continuing. This refractory period tends to lengthen as men age.

Women experience a comparable version of this — the phase right after orgasm when clitoral touch feels almost painful. So give him the same grace.

Why not put on a show and masturbate for him in the meantime? That alone might bring him right back into the mood.

13. Men Can Learn to Have Multiple Orgasms Too

We're nearing the end of our list of sex facts about men, but this next one tends to fascinate people the most! With practice, men can become multi-orgasmic, which often makes them better lovers overall. A few techniques make this possible, most commonly prostate massage and learning to achieve dry orgasms.

There's an entire book, The Multi-Orgasmic Man, devoted to walking men through this process, which takes time and practice to master.

14. They Might Not Realize They Have an STI

Our final fact about male sexuality is a sobering one. Roughly three out of four people will contract HPV at some point in their life, yet there's still no approved test for men. HPV can sometimes cause genital warts, but many strains produce no symptoms whatsoever. That makes it especially important for women to get tested, since certain HPV strains are linked to both genital warts and cancer [22].

The CDC also recommends that both young men and women get the HPV vaccine [23]. To help limit transmission, use condoms consistently (learn how), and women should stay current on cervical cancer screenings.

Did any of these sex facts about men catch you off guard? Some of them might even surprise the man in your life! Both genders are wonderfully complex, and hopefully these facts give you a little extra insight for your own sex life.

November 20, 2020