Vaginal Orgasms: Your Guide To Full-Body Orgasmic Bliss

If vaginal orgasms have been elusive so far, you're in the right place. This chapter of the Orgasm Guide walks through the exact steps for experiencing them, both during partnered sex and solo.

Nearly every woman is capable of a vaginal orgasm. It really comes down to the right technique, plus clearing away whatever mental roadblocks are getting in the way of climaxing this way.

This chapter splits into two parts:

First, a quick anatomy refresher, the science behind vaginal orgasms, and why they differ from clitoral ones. Consider this the essential groundwork, it genuinely makes everything easier from here.

Second, the actual techniques themselves.

Let's start with the foundation.

Vaginal Vs Clitoral Orgasms

You may already know this, but just in case: clitoral orgasms come from external clitoral stimulation, while vaginal orgasms stem from internal stimulation, a penis, dildo, fingers, whatever. Plenty of people assume the G-spot is a distinct internal structure, but it may not actually be separate [1], possibly just stimulation of the deeper, internal portion of the clitoris [2].

Clitoral orgasms tend to be more common during intercourse, and fewer than half of women reach vaginal orgasm regularly this way. Among those who do, many describe them as noticeably more intense and satisfying than clitoral ones.

Finding The Right Spot

Vaginal orgasm looks a little different for every woman.

1. Some women reach one from general stimulation throughout the vagina, no specific spot required. If you're a guy trying to bring your partner there, just ask her directly! More advice on making her orgasm.

2. Others need focused stimulation on the G Spot, along the front (anterior) wall [3]. Some researchers question whether a truly distinct G-spot structure exists [4], but we firmly believe in it. It sits roughly 2 inches inside, on the front wall, though it can genuinely be tricky to locate. Want the full breakdown? Read this in-depth guide.

3. Some women need intense stimulation of the A Spot instead (also called the Deep Spot or anterior fornix erogenous zone/AFE). It sits on the same front wall as the G Spot, just deeper. Its location is shown below.

That said, vaginal sensitivity varies enough that other spots might feel just as good.

Figuring out exactly what kind of stimulation gets you there depends entirely on your own body and preferences, so some experimentation is genuinely necessary.

Mental Roadblocks To Vaginal Orgasm

Quick question: are you already getting close to vaginal orgasm during sex? Right at the edge, just needing that final nudge?

If yes, and this happens fairly regularly, feel free to skip straight to the vaginal orgasm techniques. If you're currently getting little to no vaginal pleasure, or not even coming close, keep reading.

Nearly all women who struggle with vaginal orgasm share the same underlying issue: mental blocks preventing full relaxation and letting go. Common culprits include:

• Stress
• Trying to "force" the orgasm
• Frustration over not being able to climax [5], a genuinely vicious cycle
• Performance anxiety
• Negative past experiences
• Worry over whether your vagina is "normal" or different

Sounds obvious when laid out like this, right?

Of course arousal's harder when you're stressed about a looming work deadline, something we cover in our guide to boosting libido.

Pressuring yourself to orgasm inevitably works against you, making it harder to actually get there.

Past negative experiences, an ex who only cared about his own pleasure, for instance, can make focusing on your own satisfaction genuinely hard even with a new, caring partner.

Vaginal orgasm becomes dramatically easier once you can get into a relaxed headspace, free from stress, worry, or performance pressure.

Rather than devoting this whole guide to mental blocks, we've built a dedicated resource covering strategies to work through them. Read it here.

Once you've addressed those mental obstacles, it's time for the actual techniques that'll push you toward orgasmic bliss.

A Journey For One First

As covered in the first chapter of the Orgasm Guide, attempting vaginal orgasm solo first tends to work better, less pressure to perform.

Start with a penis-shaped dildo to mimic partnered sex, or use a regular dildo or your own fingers if they reach comfortably.

Once inserted, the goal is finding the most pleasurable spot to stimulate, usually your G Spot or Deep Spot, as mentioned.

Maneuver your dildo into position and start stimulating that spot, experimenting with the techniques below solo before bringing them into partnered sex.

Techniques For Vaginal Orgasm

1. Angle And Position

Think through the most satisfying penetration angle, whether solo or partnered. Is your dildo angled up, down, or slightly to one side? Straight in? Once you've nailed the ideal angle, you can recreate it with a partner.

Need help finding a position that matches your favorite angle? Over 100 sex positions await here.

2. Depth

There's a persistent myth that deeper is always better. True for some women [6] [7], but not universally. The G Spot sits just 2-3 inches in, so if that's your trigger, especially deep penetration might not even be necessary.

The A Spot, though, sits considerably deeper. Some women experience genuinely intense, full-body orgasms from stimulation there. If that's your preference, deeper penetration will matter a lot more to you.

3. Speed

Another persistent myth: faster is always better. You probably already know that's not quite right. The real answer is finding the RIGHT RHYTHM, fast, slow, or somewhere in between, tailored to you.

A steady, consistent rhythm also tends to beat constant stopping, starting, or shifting speed abruptly.

4. Intensity

Preference varies here too. Do you prefer gentle, loving strokes, or wilder, more intense, animalistic sex where he's giving everything he's got?

Most people enjoy both depending on mood. A wild night out might call for intense energy, while an emotional heart-to-heart beforehand might make slower, tender sex feel more fitting.

5. Size

No way around it: penis size genuinely matters for vaginal orgasm. Too short or not enough girth, and stimulation won't be intense enough. Too large, and discomfort or pain can replace pleasure entirely. Excessive length causes similar problems.

For a significant number of women, average or slightly above-average size is ideal [8], provided the person attached to it knows what they're doing and genuinely listens to feedback.

Still, plenty of women prefer larger, others prefer smaller. Entirely a matter of personal taste.

6. The Magic Touch

A technique rarely discussed: applying constant, unmoving pressure to a specific internal spot with his penis. To try it, he penetrates until the tip presses firmly against the target spot, then holds perfectly still, maintaining steady pressure.

A great target for this technique, once he's fully inside, is the A Spot.

Plenty of women find this feels incredible, others get little out of it at all.

Plenty of other finger and hand techniques exist too, adaptable for sex or dildo use. These include the Hook, Push The Button, Come Hither, and the Arm Shaker, all described here.

7. Finding The Right Position

Naturally, position matters enormously for vaginal orgasm. Just like the techniques above, the only real way to find your ideal position is through trial and error.

Fortunately, we've got you covered, over 100 positions with full demonstrations here.

The Bottom Line

The final word on reaching vaginal orgasm with a partner: talk to him. Cheesy as it sounds, communication genuinely is the key [9]. Trading feedback on what each of you enjoys gets you in sync fast, and vaginal orgasm becomes noticeably easier the more you practice this together.

February 10, 2018