Skype Sex 101: A Complete Guide To Doing It Right

If you're in a long-distance relationship, Skype sex is one of the best tools you have for keeping the spark alive with your man. This guide walks you through exactly how to set things up and make it enjoyable for both of you. We'll start with the logistics — getting everything ready so you both get the most out of it — before moving on to the fun part (don't worry, that's coming!).

Setting Up For Skype Sex

Before you dive into Skype sex with your man, there's some prep work to handle first.

Your Screen

Most people have Skype sex using a laptop or desktop. If you happen to have access to a computer with a larger display, even better.

A lot of flatscreen TVs can also connect to your computer these days. That means you can pull up a much bigger view of your partner if you want it.

Camera/Webcam

You'll want a decent webcam when you're filming yourself for your man. As I always say, men respond mostly to what they see. So aim for the clearest picture quality you can manage.

Luckily, most newer computers (Apple, Dell, IBM, HP, and so on) come with solid built-in webcams. And if your machine is on the older side, a 1080p HD webcam can be had for as little as $40.

Audio

Sound is the next piece to sort out. You'll both want to catch every sound the other one makes. Most computers already have a decent built-in mic, so that half is usually covered.

Hearing him clearly is the other half.

Best case, you're both somewhere private where you can crank the volume and pick up on every little detail. If you have to keep things quiet, earbuds work better than big headphones — try to skip the headphones altogether, since they're not exactly a turn-on to look at.

Lighting

Nailing the lighting isn't complicated. The room doesn't need to be well-lit — just aim soft light toward your body. Bump up your screen brightness a bit and switch off your room's main light. Need more? Set a lamp behind your camera and point it your way.

Candles placed on a chair or table behind you add to the mood, and give your man something nice to look at while you're on the call.

What's Your Role In This?

Since Skype sex means no touching, tasting, or smelling each other, your job is to focus on the visual and verbal side of things.

Presentation

Getting dressed up in something sexy makes a real difference for great Skype sex. Have at least one bra-and-panty set that makes you feel hot. Lingerie, a sexy outfit, or anything else you both enjoy works too.

If your webcams and screens are HD, your man should ideally be able to see your entire body. If not, make sure he can at least see your upper half — face down to your groin.

Sitting at the end of your bed tends to work best, since it lets you lean back when you want to.

Getting Started

Your first Skype sex session with your man will probably feel exciting, fun, and a bit awkward all at once. You might not know exactly where to begin.

Take a look at my guide on How To Have Phone Sex for solid advice on kicking things off.

The simplest approach is to start touching yourself while you talk. Begin at your thighs, work up to your breasts, and when you feel ready, move down toward your groin.

From there, the options open up. You could lie back and start masturbating with your fingers, or...

Bring In The Toys

A sex toy can stand in for your man here. Try masturbating with a vibrator or a dildo, or whatever toy really does it for you instead.

Toys aren't mandatory for Skype sex, though. The main reason I suggest them is to give your man a show.

Your man can get in on the toy action too — a fleshlight or a butt plug are both options for him.

Give Each Other Feedback

Some couples just like watching each other reach climax, but most people want to hear feedback and get direction from their partner.

Feedback and direction generally boil down to three things:

1. Let your man know how good it feels. Moan, groan, or just say it out loud.

2. Ask him for direction. Try:

What do you want me to do next?

or

Where do you want to put your cock? (works well if you're using a dildo or vibrator).

1. Give him direction and little tasks. Try lines like:

I love watching you hold your cock like that!

or

I want to see you jerk it while you look at me!

or

Watch me finger myself first — then I want to see you finish.

Talking During It

Visuals are only one half of great Skype sex. What you say to each other matters just as much. This talking dirty tutorial video is a great resource if dirty talk doesn't come naturally to you yet.

On top of talking dirty, narrate what you're feeling and what you want him to do next.

Top Tips For Better Skype Sex

The Director Game

In this Skype roleplay, one of you takes on the role of "The Director." If it's your man's turn, he calls the shots and tells you exactly what to do.

Touch yourself! Massage your breasts! Finger yourself! Turn around!

Whatever he says goes — he's the director! Just remember to swap roles so you both get a turn at this Skype sex game.

Check out these 43 hot role play ideas for more inspiration with your partner.

The Striptease Show

This one is pretty self-explanatory. Start your session fully dressed, then dance and undress gradually as things heat up.

Once you're naked or down to your underwear, transition into regular Skype sex. A chair nearby makes things easier — dancing beside it while you strip gives you something to hold onto so you feel less exposed or clumsy.

The Reveal

Before your next private Skype call, slip into something sexy and tight, then throw a big coat, jacket, or hoodie over it so your man has no idea what's underneath.

The goal is to catch him off guard by revealing your outfit when he least expects it.

Just make sure he's alone and somewhere private first, so no one else catches an eyeshot!

Remote-Controlled Toys

Want something more interactive? You can buy toys that let each of you control the other's pleasure remotely — think remote-controlled vibrators that put you both in the driver's seat.

The Catch With Skype Sex

This guide should set you up nicely to stay sexually connected with your man across the miles, but...

(there's always a catch, sorry!)

Plenty of students I've spoken with have echoed the same thing after trying Skype sex with their partner. It feels amazing in the moment! But...

Skipping the cuddling and physical closeness afterward can leave you feeling a little hollow or lonely.

So if Skype sex is a regular thing but you're rarely together in person, expect those feelings to show up from time to time.

I know this guide covers a lot, but if you want to dig deeper into talking dirty during Skype sex, this instructional video on how to talk dirty is worth your time. Happy Skype Sex!

April 11, 2021